Dating after divorce in your 50s
"Separation or divorce is an emotionally draining time.
Although it might be tempting to lick your wounds with positive attention from another, this distraction can actually inhibit you from the healing work that is necessary to move forward in a healthy way with someone in the future." "If the 'why' is to avoid painful feelings like hurt, anger, or loneliness, then it may be helpful to take some time to heal before jumping back into dating," says Jaclyn Friedenthal, Psy. "If the 'why' is because you have taken time to heal, you now to date, and you're willing to feel all the emotions involved in dating again, then it’s a good sign that you're ready.
You don't have to dive head-first into intense one-on-ones.
"Talk over the phone a lot and go on many dates that are different in type," Jones says.
"The mistake I see many people make in this post-divorce relationship is thinking this relationship won't have its own challenges," Jones says.
"Instead, you can look at it as an experience to learn more about yourself and the new life you’re creating for yourself moving forward."It is possible that your first relationship post-divorce might not be a rebound, but there's a lot of "ifs" that go along with that.
"More important than the length of time is what one does during that time," says Christina Jones, LCSW.
"It's important to be self-reflective and mourn the loss, as well as learn what one can 'do' better in their next relationship." But, once you're ready, these tips will make it easier.
A more mature woman, finished with child bearing and raising, can provide companionship and will be more likely to share more common interests with a man her own age.
I see many women in their 50's and 60's struggling to find a good man after a divorce because men are dating younger women and it makes me sad."Let them know that it’s okay to be angry, nervous, or sad about your new relationship.