Dating a man going through a bitter divorce
Rather than go through the pain of separation, couples persist in having ambivalent feelings and repeatedly try to reconcile over many years.
Such couples are deeply emotionally and sexually bonded and maintain idealized images of one another.
Studies show that men feel empty, guilty, anxious, depressed, deep loss, and strong dependency needs of which they were unaware.
Throughout the first year, both parents continue to feel anxious, angry, depressed, rejected, and incompetent.
More than two-thirds say they would call their ex-spouse first in a crisis.
This creates a constant state of disequilibrium; particularly where children are involved.
If your divorce has turned into a slugfight, there are ways to look after yourself (and your kids) until you reach solid ground – which you will. Nothing we go through is ever wasted and it’s important to be open to the learnings. You might wonder how it got to this and when it will end. When you put yourself on the right path, good things will always come.Sometimes it will get worse before it gets better but always, if the relationship was a bad one, it will be worth it.Walking away takes self-respect, self-love and courage and is the only way to position yourself (and your kids if you have them) for the life you deserve.Sometimes, a couple's emotional connections will undermine the attempts to separate.
These couples are highly reactive and co-dependent.The parents must redefine a new, non-intimate, co-parent relationship and independent relationships with the children. One who was over-functioning becomes irresponsible; the under-functioning spouse tries to be the perfect mom or dad.